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Annie Krasner, Acid Queen of the Black Circle

Finn Avison

An extract from Annie Krasner, Acid Queen of the Black Circle, a one act coming of age tragedy-comedy-horror.

 


Dodd Wood, Cumbria. Summer 1982. Night-time.

A black rope tied into a noose hangs centre stage.

Enter ANN (18) stage right, wearing a rucksack. She sees the noose and smiles.

She turns back where she came from and shouts offstage.

ANN            This is where it happened. ‘The Black Noose of Dodd Wood’.

She is followed by an uncertain GRACE (20), squinting upwards, searching. Ann places her rucksack on the right of the stage.

ANN            You see it?

Grace shakes her head no.

ANN            Apparently it was some girl, about my age. They never even found her body. Cool, right?

Grace, still searching in vain for the noose above, jumps back from something at her feet.

ANN            You ok?

GRACE          Yes. Sorry. I thought there was a – a snake crawling up my skirt.

ANN            First for everything. Why would you wear a skirt anyway? Do you actually not have anything else?

GRACE          Well, I/

ANN            That’s mental. Here, look what trousers can do.

Ann takes a small baggy from her pocket and waves it at Grace.

ANN            Drugs! Probably why Moses said we’re not meant to wear them.

Grace nervously attempts to joke:

GRACE          Maybe that’s why my ma won’t buy them for me.

Ann gets a little defensive.

ANN            What, you think my mum bought me these? That – Nazi? It’s called shoplifting, Gracey.

GRACE          Oh, right. My ma says it’s ridiculous the clothes you wear, she says you’re picking up boys by showing them your knees.

Ann stares at Grace, shaking her head. She shakes the baggy.

ANN            We should take these now so you’re nice and mellow when the rest of The Black Circle gets here.

GRACE          Is that what it does, calms you down?

ANN            Acid? Mate, it does whatever you want it to, it’s about mindset.

She passes Grace her tab. Grace looks at it, unconvinced.

GRACE          I think mindset might be the problem, Annie, I’m not really sure I want to do this.

ANN            Why did you agree to come if you’re just going to be a piss baby?

GRACE          I don’t know, I felt like I should trust you.

Ann smugly fishes two tabs from the bag and replaces it in her pocket. She passes one to Grace.

ANN            Wise. But there’s some things that are going to happen tonight that you’re not going to want to be sober for. Now, do you remember how I said to take them?

GRACE          Just, sort of, swirl it around.

ANN            Yeah, a minute or so. Ready?

GRACE          You’ve changed, Annie.

ANN            Good. Three, two, one –

They put the tabs in their mouths and talk as they swirl them around.

ANN            It’ll be ok. Just think calm thoughts.

GRACE          When am I allowed to know what the big thing we’re doing is?

ANN            When the acid sets in and you won’t freak out. I’m so excited, Grace, tonight is going to change your life. You’ll finally be free. No more – skirts and prayer.

GRACE          I like my skirts.

ANN            Mmhmm. I think if you put it, sort of, under your tongue, that’s where the blood vessels are. So – are there actually snakes here?

GRACE          Adders.

ANN            Really?

GRACE          And grass snakes, so says my ma.

Ann adopts a mocking Northern Irish accent.

ANN            And you listen to me, Gracey, so you will, The Devil could be in any one of them, so he could.

Grace doesn’t laugh.

ANN            I’m surprised he has time to bother Cumbrian voles with all his commitments in the music industry.

GRACE          You shouldn’t joke about that.

ANN            Whatever.

Pause.

GRACE          Do you not still believe in The Bible?

Ann thinks for a while.

ANN            I don’t want to be that person any more.

Grace nods uncertainly.

GRACE          Oh.

ANN            That’s kind of why we’re here. The Devil’s definitely real, though, have you met my brother?

Grace laughs, finally.

GRACE          Don’t say that, Barry’s lovely.

ANN            I think we’re about good to swallow.

The two gulp the acid down.

Long pause.

GRACE          What if I don’t like it?

ANN            You will.

GRACE          I’m scared, Annie.

NICK (17) enters from the right, wearing a rucksack and carrying a jerry can. His line begins as he enters.

NICK           As the fire burns and we worship our Lord!

ANN            The virgin will fall to the miscreant’s sword!

As Nick reaches Ann they both make the devil horns sign with their hands and awkwardly bump them together.

NICK           All hail our Acid Queen!

ANN            Nicky Nick! Nick Six! How’s tricks, Nicks?

NICK           Tricks is good, tricks is good. Your knees are looking good today.

Ann is a bit weirded out by this.

ANN            Oh.

Immediate uncomfortable silence. Nick distracts himself by putting his bag with the others.

ANN            So this is my cousin, Grace. Her and her folks came over from Belfast with me and mine, but they stayed mental, so I’m showing her a good time before I go off and leave her to Jesus. Grace, this is Nick, he’s a penis.

NICK           Heh, more like, I’ve got a penis. Hello, Grace. It’s nice to meet you. Really nice.

He puts out his hand for her to shake.

GRACE          Oh, no thank you.

ANN            I wouldn’t bother, she doesn’t know about boys yet.

Nick retracts his hand.

NICK           Understood. So you’re, like, full on Jovie?

GRACE          We’re Jehovah’s Witnesses, yes.

NICK           Cool. And you’re fine with the/

ANN            Ah-da-da. She doesn’t know yet. It’s a surprise.

NICK           Jesus, are you serious?

The girls nod. Ann confident, Grace not so much.

NICK           Oh. It’s alright, Grace, I’ll keep you safe.

GRACE          From what?

NICK           Erm.

He lifts up the jerry can.

NICK           Look what I got!

ANN            Good boy, Nicky.

NICK           Yeah, my step-mum won’t even notice it’s gone, the old – the old – she’s old.

ANN            Totally. Can I get a sniff?

NICK           Yeah, totally.

He unscrews the lid and takes a deep huff himself. ‘Aaaahhhh’.

NICK           That’s good shit.

He then points it at Ann, who sniffs deeply.

Her face drops and she takes a few smaller inquisitive sniffs.

NICK           You OK?

ANN            Grace, have a smell.

GRACE          No, I won’t, thank you.

ANN            Just – do it.

Grace takes a cautionary sniff.

ANN            What does it smell like to you?

GRACE          What’s it supposed to be?

NICK           Petrol.

GRACE          Then petrol. Wait, why?

ANN            No, petrol has a distinct – petrolly smell. Which I’m not getting here. Nick, does your mum even drive?

NICK           Step-mum, and – aah, no I see what’s happened here.

ANN            Yeah?

NICK           This is her watering can.

ANN            Brilliant, Nick, thanks for that.

NICK           It was dark.

ANN            So you couldn’t smell?

GRACE          I’m really not comfortable with this.

ANN            Calm thoughts, Grace, and don’t worry about it, it was just to burn the/

GRACE          The woods?

ANN            No!

NICK           That’s a good point, actually. Thank you, Grace, no, it’d be daft to start a fire here, wouldn’t it?

ANN            Maybe.

NICK           So really, I did you a favour.

Ann glares at Nick, then concedes defeat and nods.

ANN            We’ll need to do something. Can you dig a hole?

NICK           Ha! Do you even need to ask? I’m at optimal physical fitness, ladies. I can bench press my own bodyweight. I can run a mile in under eight minutes, ok? I can curl ten/

He is interrupted by PETE (18), who enters stage right with a gym bag over his shoulder. He is carrying a large cardboard box, painted black with a red pentagram.

PETE           Whaddup, fuckers!

He puts his bag down with the others and walks to the group.

ANN            Hey Pete, you – fucking – shit.

PETE           Cool.

ANN            Yeah.

PETE           And who is this fine creature?

ANN            This is Grace.

PETE           Well hello, Grace, how are we doing today?

Pete takes Grace’s hand and kisses it. Nobody except Pete appears too thrilled about this.

GRACE          I’m frightened.

PETE           Don’t worry yourself, my dear, you’re in safe hands, now that I’m here. We ready to do some evil shit? Raise some hell?

ANN            Hell yes, we are! Just waiting for Jill.

PETE           Nice. Hey – To you, our Lord, our lives we devote.

ALL            The Black Circle closes on the innocent’s throat.

PETE           Love it.

Ann stares at Grace, concerned that she just joined in.

PETE           Hey, check this out!

Pete proudly raises his box to be admired, then realises himself and gently drops it, trying to appear nonchalant.

PETE           Didn’t even try, like at all.

NICK           Is that the altar?

PETE           Yeah, for the slaughter.

NICK           It’s made of cardboard. What if it falters?

PETE           Nah. Sturdy as the Rock of Gibraltar.

NICK           You should’ve used mortar.

ANN            Guys, what?

NICK           It’s just going to collapse.

PETE           Yeah, like the fucking earth is opening up. What could be more metal than that?

Grace points to the pentagram.

GRACE          Is Pete Jewish?

PETE           What?

ANN            Grace!

PETE           Oh. No, the Star of David has six sides, this has five, it’s a pentagram. Or whatever.

Pete thinks to himself for a moment, and then traces his finger along the pentagram, mouthing the count of the points.

ANN            You can’t say things like that around the straights.

NICK           Yeah, Grace, I think you’re a well cool person, but it isn’t rad to aggressively ask someone their religion like that. It’s ok, though. I’ll forgive you.

Ann glares at Nick, confused, for a second.

ANN            Where’s Jill? She’s an hour late.

As soon as Pete finishes tracing, the group jumps at a sudden crash of thunder and lightning. Nick scoots closer to Grace.

Enter JILL (19) stage left, carrying a large pet cage with a plain black sheet draped over it.

JILL           Speak of the devil – you’ll get me. And I’m way worse.

PETE           Ayy, here she is.

ANN            Jill! this is/

JILL           Good to see you Grace.

Grace, fearful, retreats behind Nick.

Jill gestures to the cage.

JILL           Sorry I’m late. Our new friend wasn’t a big fan of what I had planned for her.

Jill walks past the others and places the cage in exact centre stage, slightly behind the noose. Ann gestures to it.

ANN            Is that – it?

JILL           Certainly is. Grace, you’re wondering what’s in here.

GRACE          Erm.

SFX of a faint meowing.

JILL           It’s your future, my dear.

ANN            Jill, just – she’s just dropped her first acid, we’re trying to keep her thoughts calm.

PETE           You two dropped?

ANN            Sure did.

PETE           Nice.

NICK           Drugs are really rad, aren’t they Grace?

GRACE          No.

NICK           No.

JILL           Alright, the five corners are here, we can begin. I suspect we’ll be needing this.

She pulls out a kitchen knife from her jean pocket. The group admires it for a second.

Ann’s voice is heard, although her lips don’t move:

<ANN>          Danger.

Nobody seems to notice. Ann reaches towards the knife.

PETE           No, wait!

Despite Pete’s cry, Ann grabs the blade. She cries out in pain and grasps her now bloody hand. The knife falls to the floor.

Jill laughs, the others gasp.

JILL           Clumsy wench.

GRACE          Lord help us.

PETE           Shit, are you ok?

ANN            Yeah. I – Yeah.

PETE           Come over here a second.

Pete escorts Ann over to the bags and opens his gym bag.

GRACE          Is she ok?

Grace tries to follow them, but Nick blocks her way.

NICK           She’ll be fine. Come here a second.

Nick escorts the reluctant Grace to the other side of the stage and begins to talk to her inaudibly.

This leaves Jill in centre stage, staring out at the audience. A smile slowly creeps onto her face.

Pete pulls a mini first aid kit out of his bag.

PETE           Here we are.

ANN            Is that a first aid kit?

He begins inspecting her hand.

PETE           I skate. Oh man, this is deep, what were you thinking?

ANN            I don’t think I was.

He goes back to his bag and retrieves a medical textbook.

ANN            What is that?

He starts flicking through it.

PETE           Textbook.

ANN            For if you skateboard your leg off?

PETE           Could happen.

ANN            Ok, Tony Hawk.

Pete raises his eyebrow and ignores her.

Nick puts a hand on Grace’s shoulder. She doesn’t object.

ANN            Why do you actually have it?

PETE           That’s a – valid question. Alright. It’s not a big deal, but I’m going to university.

Pete returns to the textbook.

ANN            Pete’s going to uni? What, to do medicine?

PETE           Adult Nursing. Like I say, it isn’t a big deal.

ANN            Woah.

Pause.

Pete turns to Ann.

PETE           To be clear, I don’t actually want to, I just don’t know what else to do and my parents are/

ANN            Same!

PETE           What?

Jill starts waving at us.

ANN            I’m doing Adult Nursing, same as you!

PETE           What? Where?

A gust of wind. The altar blows across the stage, towards Nick and Grace, who are still talking quietly to each other.

Pete shouts after it:

PETE           STOP IT!

GRACE          Oh, oh no.

Grace panics and stamps on it, crushing it.

PETE           No!

GRACE          Oh gosh I’m so sorry.

PETE           Use your hands, woman!

NICK           Don’t talk to my girlfriend like that!

PETE           Nick, you’re ugly mate, nothing’s going to change that, it’s a fact.

They converge back to centre stage. Ann’s hand still bloody.

The cage meows again, slightly louder.

NICK           There are no facts, only interpretations. Nietzsche.

PETE           I don’t care, lick my hole. Kant. Nietzsche was a fascist, by the way.

ANN            Since when are you allowed boyfriends?

GRACE          Well – I mean – we’re not properly/

ANN            You haven’t had sex, have you?

GRACE          Lord, no.

ANN            Ok, cool. Phew.

GRACE          I wouldn’t even know how.

Nick grabs Grace’s hand and looks into her eyes.

NICK           We can work it out.

A second gust blows the flattened altar off stage entirely.

PETE           Well that’s great. I’m going to Carlisle in a couple of days, I’ll pick it up on the A6.

Jill turns and nods at Grace, who bellows out:

GRACE          THIS WILL NOT STAND!

Ann stares at her in shock.

ANN            Hey guys – I think the acid’s kicking in.

PETE           Nice. You good?

ANN            My leg feels good.

Jill loudly clears her throat, silencing everyone.

JILL           We should get on with the ritual. I’d suggest we have a look at what we’re working with. Right Ann?

ANN            I agree.

They turn towards the cage.

Another meow, very loud, very pained. Continuous.

ANN            Can anyone else hear that?

JILL           No, they can’t. Get on with it.

Ann reaches towards the covered cage, then hesitates.

ANN            It feels a lot different to when we were just talking about it.

NICK           Yeah, I feel a bit sick.

PETE           GRID, probably. We should get you home.

NICK           Don’t listen to him, Grace, I don’t have GRID.

PETE           I’m serious, if you don’t feel well, maybe we should postpone.

ANN            I agree.

Jill looks at Ann, Pete, and Nick.

JILL           I see how it is.

PETE           I’m just worried about Nick’s health. Plus – you know – we don’t have an altar.

Jill mutters to the cage.

JILL           Felis pupam fit.

The meowing stops.

ANN            Exactly. Yeah, I’m calling it. We can try again some other time, maybe not with a – I mean, we appreciate/

<ANN>          Take the sheet off.

Nobody hears this except Ann. She rubs her head a little.

PETE           Are you ok?

ANN            Yeah. I should –

Ann removes the sheet from the cage, revealing the stuffed Zippy from Rainbow toy sat inside.

The group stare in for a while.

ANN            Guys, I think I’m having a bad trip.

End of Extract.

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